Put yourself out there.

It’s as simple as that. Put yourself out there. Make yourself visible. Ask more of yourself than you did the day before. Simply put, these are the basic laws and steps on what it takes to be successful – and it’s what so many of us today overlook and fail to see. We spend too much time “perfecting” our craft, our offer, our pitch or our product and get so hung up on processing the perfection that we fail to put ourselves forward with what we already have.

We doubt ourselves, second-guess our ability…


Question the goals we’ve set out to achieve and wonder if we’re truly capable of going after and getting what we desire and want. If we’re not afraid of failing, we’re scared of our own success. Deep within the mind, when our goals are big enough, the thought of achieving them may actually scare us even more than the thought of failing to make them come true.

Ever get called for an interview where you think “FINALLY! This is what I’ve been waiting for!” only to start hearing, “maybe I shouldn’t move forward with it though. It might take too much time away from my family. Maybe I’ll have to travel a lot more and be away from the kids.”

How about the time the door to an amazing opportunity or gig opened up in your path and after feeling a rush of joy and excitement, you started to feel nervous and queasy inside?

With exciting opportunities and “breaks” that come our way…


We tend to go through a sort of two-stage thinking process – especially when it comes to big goals and visions we set for ourselves. Our first reaction may entail being ecstatic and excited for the new possibilities that await us. We’ll commonly find that we’re soon interrupted by our brain signalling to us that such a significant goal (if achieved) may bring about so much change that we’d feel uncomfortable, unfamiliar and different from who we are today.

To our brains, which have been designed to keep us safe and away from danger since prehistoric times, in today’s age, such a dramatic change usually serves as a red flag for danger.
This is a lesson that you do not want to forget – especially for when you’re working towards your goal and you’ve gotten around to step out from the “cave of perfection” to really get things going by putting yourself out there. You may first respond with an excited nature, soon to realise that you’ve put the goal off to a side. Started taking on other tasks and have stopped giving it a position of priority on your to-do list.

“I’ll get to it later, I’ve just got so much to do today.”


It’s what you’ll tell yourself to console the behaviour you’ve slowly but surely developed


What you’re subconsciously doing, however, is sabotaging your own success. That uneasiness that you felt shortly after the rush of excitement, the nervousness that seeped its way past your initial eagerness – left its mark within you and although on the outside, you “want” that big promotion, new job or gig, deep inside you feel doubt, fear and uncertainty about how it’ll newly align with you. Instead of working towards it at full speed, we tend to hold back and actually try and stop ourselves from getting ahead and bringing upon us such a change!

Tapping into mastering our minds and performance is crucial for taking charge…


Getting rid of these nasty habits and creating new supporting beliefs and thinking patterns that will get us to embrace big visions and change! Take some time today to think about it – what have you been putting off lately? What are the major benefits and changes you can reap by taking action on what you’ve been putting off? Chances are that if there are some exciting, big benefits you could be experiencing, you may have been unintentionally trying to sabotage your own success!

I encourage you to go on and break that nasty habit! What’s most effective to do so is a lot simpler than one may think! Make a chart of What’s working and what’s not in terms of your actions, reactions and thoughts on a daily basis – especially when a fresh, exciting new opportunity comes your way! Go ahead and check yourself out! (The way you’ve been reacting and responding).

To toss out the old and bring in the new, you’ve got to identify what’s disempowering you first and what you can do instead! Whatever’s keeping you from moving ahead, identify it, stop and replace it. The more you can filter through what’s working and what’s not, the better you’ll get at picking up on these self-sabotaging habits that keep you stalled or stagnant and the quicker you’ll be to move ahead!

Nilushi Kariyawasam

Nilushi Kariyawasam is the founder of The School of Mind-Blowing Success, author of the upcoming book Revolutionize Your Success, engineering graduate and multi-lingual international speaker. Her first international talks were technical-based, published by MPIF and personally given at The Bellagio in Las Vegas when she was only 23. In addition to her current business ventures, she regularly interviews and speaks on topics including success, leadership, personal mastery, networking and STEM.
Nilushi Kariyawasam

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